The Monday Mindset: Skill Development - Asking for Help

This past month we spoke about how to reach our goals by obtaining the mindset of time management (prioritizing) and taking action (initiating). While these skills lean towards improvement on our individual selves, we should remember that the final skill to success is a collaborative one.

 

This skill paramount to any successes we value in life is help.

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We seem to praise independence as something to aspire to be, and though it may appear to make you “stronger,” it is in fact, impossible to be. We are infinitely weaker when we try to succeed on our own. Even the best doers, organizers, motivators, and leaders ask for help. Why? Because they understand potential is limited with only one mind. 

 

No matter how brilliant your mind or strategy, if you’re playing a solo game, you’ll always lose out to a team.
— Reid Hoffman

 

One mind can only go so far. We may have a hundred ideas in our heads, but so does the next person; when we ask for help and collaborate with that next person we accumulate two hundred ideas and spark new ones. As we ask for help we move one step closer to achieving our goals because our limitations are reduced. 

The key to help is knowing when and why we need it. As previously stated, life is full of contingencies and situations will arise that we are unprepared for, we will have to make major decisions that will have major consequences. Whether it is personal or professional it is never an easy task when it involves our future. In times like these we need to have the ability to multiply our ideas, and strengths, by asking for help. Acquiring feedback from the people beside you will provide you with more options on how to tackle these situations, with the best outcomes. 

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From a personal standpoint, I am especially guilty of trying to tackle the world on my own. Most of my life, adolescence into my twenties, I never asked for help. This resulted in a plethora of mistakes that I am making up for still to this day. My goals and aspirations were always large and I had the skills to prioritize and take initiative; but, I never wanted help and continuously felt like a failure when I couldn’t undertake it on my own. 

 

Maybe it’s our fear of looking imperfect or that others will think less of us. Perhaps we're afraid of rejection or feeling like we’re inconveniencing someone else with our tasks or problems. I’ll admit that I am guilty of these thoughts at one point or another in my life. But, now I realize that without help, I will never truly achieve my goals.

 

Success is not found in how independent we are. It is through the act of interdependence that success can be achieved; that is knowing our limitations, as human beings , and asking for assistance at the proper times. Everyday we interact with people, and create relationships. These relationships become the building blocks to our success. Through negotiation and collaboration we make the possibilities of our successes limitless, alone, our possibilities are limited. 

 

Think about it, If life was meant to be tackled alone, then why are there so many of us here?